Tuesday, February 02, 2010

A Little Quiet Talk With Myself

..::So many tags::..

While counting, grouping and rearranging the name tags for the camping trip this Friday, I had some thoughts. This afternoon, me and three other coursemates hung out at the L50 parking lot kinda discussing about the trip. They were talking about the various issues regarding the trip - progress, setbacks, brainstorming solutions, and taking inventory, among other discussions. And I saw that they are working their ASSES off for things. Not only for the camping trip, but also for the annual dinner. Efforts to raise money for those events have been and are being carried out: sales of trinkets, snack food sale..there are other efforts also in the process, I think.

It really sets me thinking: what are MY efforts in these? What have I done? It really was another slap in my face followed by a splotch of shit to the face for me. I have been putting off work. Procrastinating. And now, where has it placed me? Nowhere. I could practically feel the negativity, perhaps even bad-mouthing about me. Maybe it's just me being neurotic; but it's a good way of thinking; it kicks me back into reality. Get things done. Help out where I can.

I am in this process to better myself. Finally, a New Year resolution that is carried out (other than the weight-loss program which was an OBVIOUS success) The plan is to observe myself, my every move, its consequences, its effect upon others, and be less selfish, among others. Believe me, I'm doing my VERY BEST. Every move I make and/or word I say is thought of at least five times before being put out there, and frankly, it's nauseating, sometimes. All the close observation makes me giddy, unwell too. That's why sometimes I seem aloof and listless. And I wanna get rid of (some) bad habits too. The reason I put this out in my blog is to allow others to be aware of my efforts, and (if possible) remind me if I ever stumble. Which would be quite often.

By no means I am feeling sorry for myself; I'm not putting myself down. I'm not letting go of all responsibilities. In computer terms, I may be using more RAM to defragment, run Disk Cleanup, run a full-system antivirus scan, put up the firewall and Windows Defender instead of properly running some programs and applications. Do remind me, fellow friends, if I ever lose touch with reality or anything.

Yet, don't take this chance (I know some will) to hit me hard with guilt and any other emotional and mental assaults. Not everything is MY fault. I'm not the only bad guy. Remember something in Facebook about being "there for friends"? That statement has been thought of PLENTY of times before finally being decided to be posted. It was already practically void of loopholes. Some friends are just NOT really friends, after substantial thought on my part. They're just there through the good times, and will run away when hardship befalls. A friend's story made me aware of such individuals. Cleaning up myself also means cleaning up my friends' list; and I'm NOT referring to my Facebook's friends list.

I am still human; full of errors and imperfections.

Even God's mercy is useless without a fellow human's forgiveness to come with it.

Sunday, January 31, 2010


Woo...what a weekend! :D

SATURDAY 30th January 2010
Threw a hissy fit about not being able to go out..practically lashed out at somebody(s) for not being able to go out shopping with me...but well, it's just the Hungry Monster Mr Nazmi babbling. Then chatted up Cik Paija(FB: Faizah Fuzi) and she said that she+Kak Tim will be going to JJ to hangout and have lunch...so we went out at 2pm..but the UTM bus didn't come until 2.45.LOL..Anyway, did lunch at KFC, and stuffed myself. That's a week of dieting and exercise out the window.LOL. No matter; I have a secret weapon due this Monday....hehehe~

After lunch (lunner, actually) I did my shopping. The girls had some stuff to buy too; it was I who had to do the monthly shopping. I thought things should last well into the end of February at least, but it came short due to unplanned (and sometimes, uncontrolled) usage. Hohohoh...This time my shopping was more to buying higher-end products as opposed to the typical alternatives that I bought. So these are some of the things bought:

A mini rug...only RM13! Gotta get it...Wanna spruce up my boring room...Thanks to Kak Tim and Paija for helping me choose it! :D

Water bottle: The Plastic poisoning scare finally got to me. I CAN'T afford having atrophied balls - how am I gonna father kids later?!? Hahaha...better get a better quality bottle than the current Giant water bottle :P

Odor Stop: To clear out the MANLY smell of mine lingering around the room after my jogging/workout session :P

Blink Eyedrops: 3 friends recommended this to me. I find it effective against dryness, but I have trouble dropping the solution INTO my eye! Gotta perfect my aim with it :P

Garnier Pure-A: A higher-end product I'm trying out. Trying to counter the dryness and blemishes.
Fresh and White: Just trying out new stuff; I bought the wrong one! Thought it'd be the green gel type :(

Mentos and Happydent: Currently hooked to these candies. Guess I crave fresher breath, and the gum provides a GOOD refresher in boring sleepy classes+diet tip of the stars! :D

SUNDAY 31st January 2010
Woke up at 9am. Loafed around, Facebooked, and got showered...I intended for a Sunday of leisure and just revising, but a dear friend asked me out...for lunch and a movie...had lunch at Singgah Selalu KipMart. Good food, great crowd. Got the workers looking at me too, more towards staring. In disbelief. Creepy. What's wrong? Regardless. I'm a celebrity. It's expected. LOL~

Then went to Tebrau for a movie. Before that, my friend went to get a dose of the nicotine stick, and I went to browse. I was up to avenge my previously blah weekends, so I went into Vincci and Topman. Vincci had no choice in shades/frames...so off to Topman. None there too - sold out, I guess. So I settled with two Topman Babies~~~

Grey Topman Wallet: Had to freshen up my old wallet - thanks to the old guy for his service to me...happy retiring! :D

Scarf: Had it in mind for my annual dinner - build my wardrobe around it later; also had it in mind for my future movie trips...no more prickly neck; also, during my trips home to Sabah...be cool on the plane! :D

The BLAH movie poster. LOVED his nose, though :D

Many said that the movie (especially the ending) was BLAH. Just like the curious victim in a ghost thriller who just HAD to peek into a creepy room, I went to watch it too. Yeah. It's BLAH. LOL. Very BLAH.

Blowing money on the Topman babies were a tad OTT. But my consolation is: I won't have money for food later. A BIG CONTRIBUTION to my diet :P

Another week's coming...Let's face Monday with a smile...I'll try ;)