I am going CRAZY. I have summonses, fines and money that I owe friends to settle; on top of that I have a Ko-Q DINNER that needs paying. PLUS I have an upcoming EXAM. Assignments I have NOT done, thank you very much; I will have no money to go to KL, to go for my semesterly ritual to seek refuge there at my aunt's place during study week. Will miss October's Men's Health. Will have little money left for myself. Will run out of supplies. Will run out of SANITY.
BLEAK.
DEPRESSED.
EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE.
DESPAIR.
BOREDOM.
FEAR OF WHAT THE FUTURE BRINGS.
EMPTINESS.
FINANCIAL DIFFICULTIES.
NO LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL.
ZOMBIE-LIKE.
~shall i slit my wrist now?~
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Today in History LOL~
had to pull myself outta bed today - slept at 3.30am then woke up at 7.00am - one hour early than intended. so i let myself sleep for another hour, but practically kept one eye open - i've had nasty experience of oversleeping these extra hours, so i'd better be cautious. so then i woke up at 7.48am. executed the daily cleansing ritual, and headed to class.
class was sleepy, as always - scribbled notes to prevent dozing off. but one hour was my absolute attention span limit with an empty stomach, so 10-11 was spent chatting with my coursemates and fiddling with my phones. afterwards, i thought i'd have brunch with coursemates but no, they were occupied with other stuff, so i decided to pay a visit to the pejabat bendahari. wow, i thought - nobody's in. the tally signalled 1042. i pressed the number dispenser - 1043. the kakak at the counter promptly pressed the next button. my turn...gave her a sheepish smile, handed her my summonses slip. she then said adik, dorg blom key-in la. i was like @$#^%$# ...how could they have not keyed-in the summponses. i went to pay late on purpose because i knew they'd need time to key it in, but this is unacceptable. so i told her thanks, asked a bit about the JPA thing, then said thanks again before heading out. messaged my friend to tell him i'd be in my room so if he finished class he'd fetch me there for lunch outside. before heading back i went to the kiosk in fron of the mosque to buy some snacks: bread pudding and custard cakes (i think), plus kiwi juice. then i headed back. had lunch later, finished it, and now i'm typing this entry.
now there's some sort of function at the cafe (i think) coz it sounds so noisy and happening up there. thunder's booming up in the sky - a downpour is expected. i dunno what's gonna happen to me - so little time to jog now. i think i'd start morning jogs instead - the weathers peachy in the morning. hu3~
class was sleepy, as always - scribbled notes to prevent dozing off. but one hour was my absolute attention span limit with an empty stomach, so 10-11 was spent chatting with my coursemates and fiddling with my phones. afterwards, i thought i'd have brunch with coursemates but no, they were occupied with other stuff, so i decided to pay a visit to the pejabat bendahari. wow, i thought - nobody's in. the tally signalled 1042. i pressed the number dispenser - 1043. the kakak at the counter promptly pressed the next button. my turn...gave her a sheepish smile, handed her my summonses slip. she then said adik, dorg blom key-in la. i was like @$#^%$# ...how could they have not keyed-in the summponses. i went to pay late on purpose because i knew they'd need time to key it in, but this is unacceptable. so i told her thanks, asked a bit about the JPA thing, then said thanks again before heading out. messaged my friend to tell him i'd be in my room so if he finished class he'd fetch me there for lunch outside. before heading back i went to the kiosk in fron of the mosque to buy some snacks: bread pudding and custard cakes (i think), plus kiwi juice. then i headed back. had lunch later, finished it, and now i'm typing this entry.
now there's some sort of function at the cafe (i think) coz it sounds so noisy and happening up there. thunder's booming up in the sky - a downpour is expected. i dunno what's gonna happen to me - so little time to jog now. i think i'd start morning jogs instead - the weathers peachy in the morning. hu3~
To Dearest LM:
- I have no say in your life; you shall go wherever you choose.
- Know that you'll always be near and dear in my life.
- I will cherish the moments that we had.
- Nobody will ever replace you, nobody will be able to.
- Wherever you chose to go, may happiness follow you.
- THANK YOU, LM.
- Know that you'll always be near and dear in my life.
- I will cherish the moments that we had.
- Nobody will ever replace you, nobody will be able to.
- Wherever you chose to go, may happiness follow you.
- THANK YOU, LM.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
It's PERPLEXING~
It's PERPLEXING...~
I really don't need the extra stress now, but I am starting to juggle, and that only means one thing: I'm Getting...F4T!!! It's such a dirty word, the mere mention of it send shivers down my spine. And yet, I can't resist the Malaysian pastime of EATING...
Just got back from cafe - Shelly's Nasi Lemak and Rice+Tempeh+Kangkung in hand...with a guilty conscience in mind. Perhaps it was another being controlling my body when I bought these. Their Nasi Lemak is irresistible...Hu3~
New Eating Plan:
- Lessen Carbs
- Moderate Protein Intake
- More Veggies (especially purgative/laxative ones; ie fibre-rich)
Please, I've worked hard to achieve this..don't let it slip away....:(
I really don't need the extra stress now, but I am starting to juggle, and that only means one thing: I'm Getting...F4T!!! It's such a dirty word, the mere mention of it send shivers down my spine. And yet, I can't resist the Malaysian pastime of EATING...
Just got back from cafe - Shelly's Nasi Lemak and Rice+Tempeh+Kangkung in hand...with a guilty conscience in mind. Perhaps it was another being controlling my body when I bought these. Their Nasi Lemak is irresistible...Hu3~
New Eating Plan:
- Lessen Carbs
- Moderate Protein Intake
- More Veggies (especially purgative/laxative ones; ie fibre-rich)
Please, I've worked hard to achieve this..don't let it slip away....:(
Monday, October 12, 2009
Nothing to Do...?
Had nothing to do - decided to pick up the loose change that is strewn all over my room - always step on them - why not pick'em up for a change (no pun intended) - search every nook and cranny - PICK UP PICK UP PICK UP - tally them up - RM4.10
ABC & AIS JAGUNG, ANYONE? :D
ABC & AIS JAGUNG, ANYONE? :D
cLuMSy mE~
Today's 2pm class was nonexistent, thank goodness. Was NOT in the mood for a class - missed lunch NO THANKS to a certain smug-faced lecturer and his morning class...feels like bitchslapping his face everytime his class is on. So we just went to the 2pm class to get the assignments from the lab computer and went back to dorm. The sky was going gray, so I thought it wise to go back now before rain pours.
Arrived in my room after tapau rice+fried chicken at Ismat's...had to go there because Shelly's is mysteriously closed. Got to the cafe thanks to Miqdad...he stopped to give me a ride midway back to the hostel. The Abang Roti John even complimented me on my outfit today:striped shirt, black jeans that skim my legs with Vans slip-ons. Understated elegance. :P
After arriving in my room, I felt lucky, so I scooped up my laundry (practically pouring over the edge), the washing powder, and headed to the laundry room. Lucky me, it's unoccupied! So I put the money in, mixed the powder with the water, and threw my load in. Seeing that the load wasn't full, I went back to the room to get my blanket and sheets, along with other should-be-washed-but-didn't-coz-they-still-look-and-smell-fresh pieces of clothing. I was aghast when I returned to see my handphone sitting comfortably on the sink. Thank goodness nobody swiped it. Hu3...after throwing in the rest of the load (and then using another tenant's fabric softener, I might add) I returned to my room to eat my late lunch. Then I got online, checked my Facebook, my mail, chatted with some friends, and it was time to get the laundry. OMG I did it again...the phone was still there! I forgot to take it again, this time I'm really lucky, Alhamdulillah...third time should be the charm, but I bet it's NOT for me. ;)
Now rain is pouring ouside. Good thing, 'coz I don't plan to run today. My calves' getting funky. Better let them rest first. Hu3~
Arrived in my room after tapau rice+fried chicken at Ismat's...had to go there because Shelly's is mysteriously closed. Got to the cafe thanks to Miqdad...he stopped to give me a ride midway back to the hostel. The Abang Roti John even complimented me on my outfit today:striped shirt, black jeans that skim my legs with Vans slip-ons. Understated elegance. :P
After arriving in my room, I felt lucky, so I scooped up my laundry (practically pouring over the edge), the washing powder, and headed to the laundry room. Lucky me, it's unoccupied! So I put the money in, mixed the powder with the water, and threw my load in. Seeing that the load wasn't full, I went back to the room to get my blanket and sheets, along with other should-be-washed-but-didn't-coz-they-still-look-and-smell-fresh pieces of clothing. I was aghast when I returned to see my handphone sitting comfortably on the sink. Thank goodness nobody swiped it. Hu3...after throwing in the rest of the load (and then using another tenant's fabric softener, I might add) I returned to my room to eat my late lunch. Then I got online, checked my Facebook, my mail, chatted with some friends, and it was time to get the laundry. OMG I did it again...the phone was still there! I forgot to take it again, this time I'm really lucky, Alhamdulillah...third time should be the charm, but I bet it's NOT for me. ;)
Now rain is pouring ouside. Good thing, 'coz I don't plan to run today. My calves' getting funky. Better let them rest first. Hu3~
Thinking of You - Katy Perry
Comparisons are easily done
Once you've had a taste of perfection
Like an apple hanging from a tree
I picked the ripest one, I still got the seed
You said move on, where do I go?
I guess second best is all I will know
'Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you
(Thinking of you, thinking of you)
Thinking of you, what you would do
If you were the one who was spending the night
(Spending the night, spending the night)
Oh, I wish that I was looking into your eyes
You're like an Indian summer in the middle of winter
Like a hard candy with a surprise center
How do I get better once I've had the best?
You said there's tons of fish in the water, so the waters I will test
He kissed my lips, I taste your mouth, oh!
(Taste your mouth)
He pulled me in, I was disgusted with myself
'Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you
(Thinking of you, thinking of you)
Thinking of you, what you would do
If you were the one who was spending the night
(Spending the night, spending the night)
Oh, I wish that I was looking into
You're the best, and yes, I do regret
How I could let myself let you go
Now, now the lesson's learned
I touched it, I was burned
Oh, I think you should know!
'Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you
(Thinking of you, thinking of you)
Thinking of you, what you would do
If you were the one who was spending the night
(Spending the night, spending the night)
Oh, I wish that I was looking into your, your eyes
Looking into your eyes, looking into your eyes
Oh, won't you walk through?
And bust in the door and take me away?
Oh, no more mistakes
'Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay, stay
Comparisons are easily done
Once you've had a taste of perfection
Like an apple hanging from a tree
I picked the ripest one, I still got the seed
You said move on, where do I go?
I guess second best is all I will know
'Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you
(Thinking of you, thinking of you)
Thinking of you, what you would do
If you were the one who was spending the night
(Spending the night, spending the night)
Oh, I wish that I was looking into your eyes
You're like an Indian summer in the middle of winter
Like a hard candy with a surprise center
How do I get better once I've had the best?
You said there's tons of fish in the water, so the waters I will test
He kissed my lips, I taste your mouth, oh!
(Taste your mouth)
He pulled me in, I was disgusted with myself
'Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you
(Thinking of you, thinking of you)
Thinking of you, what you would do
If you were the one who was spending the night
(Spending the night, spending the night)
Oh, I wish that I was looking into
You're the best, and yes, I do regret
How I could let myself let you go
Now, now the lesson's learned
I touched it, I was burned
Oh, I think you should know!
'Cause when I'm with him I am thinking of you
(Thinking of you, thinking of you)
Thinking of you, what you would do
If you were the one who was spending the night
(Spending the night, spending the night)
Oh, I wish that I was looking into your, your eyes
Looking into your eyes, looking into your eyes
Oh, won't you walk through?
And bust in the door and take me away?
Oh, no more mistakes
'Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay, stay
!%$@%#%$@
What an effin' class. It was supposed to end at 12.30pm, but push and push and push, we finally got out at 1.40pm! I had a lunchdate slotted with a friend this afternoon, and he was already waiting at C06. Just as I was typing a message to notify him, his message came in: "I'm going back to class. It's too late already." !$@%#$@%#$ was going through my brain: fueled by adrenaline levels,and further aggravated by an empty stomach. I felt like throwing a chair at HIM. WTF?! So what if we haven't finished the work? We could finish it in our rooms; it's not a big deal. Just because we are students we don't get a say? Don't get me started on Human Rights.
So I was apologizing profusely to my friend; although he said it's okay, I doubt he's really okay. I made him wait one hour just coz of the stupid person. So what if he's great at what he does. He still is stupid for letting us out THAT late.
I'M SORRY FRIEND...;(
So I was apologizing profusely to my friend; although he said it's okay, I doubt he's really okay. I made him wait one hour just coz of the stupid person. So what if he's great at what he does. He still is stupid for letting us out THAT late.
I'M SORRY FRIEND...;(
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Good Morning Malaysia~
Hye hye goodmorning...crashed at a friend's place last night...helped out with his open house preparations for today. as a result, slept at one, woke up at six coz he had to go fetch his mum in Tebrau...so here i am now, back in my room and facing my laptop...:D
What to talk about: while helping out, he gave a preview (or rather, pre-taste) of the menu for today: Mee Bandung. but he cooked so much of it and ordered me to finish it all by myself! it was tasty...(long time no taste home-cooked meal) but not spicy enough he cant stand spicy, you see...hu3
Anyway, good luck for your open house today friend, may it go smoothly :D
What to talk about: while helping out, he gave a preview (or rather, pre-taste) of the menu for today: Mee Bandung. but he cooked so much of it and ordered me to finish it all by myself! it was tasty...(long time no taste home-cooked meal) but not spicy enough he cant stand spicy, you see...hu3
Anyway, good luck for your open house today friend, may it go smoothly :D
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