Wednesday, October 27, 2010

vent vent vent

actually i am typing this while i am at the fac, going online - i can't stand being in the room, going only oh-so-slowly... it's like a slow death by depression and stress. God knows how much bad chemicals my body are producing that are messing up my body (look it up)... the cool wind, the orbiting mosquitoes around my calves, weird sounds from the guy's lappy on the table next to mine, some people who are trying to finish up assignments whilst going on Facebook and invading my personal space with their annoying voices and tangled extension cables... 


it has been an emotional day - having tons of elation but with the accompanying melancholia to even things out - life teaches us to be wary of our emotions by doing that - mindless laughter will eventually lead to sadness. and also anger and disappointment at something and some people. the trip to India was canceled (sob-sob) and replaced by a (kinda) far-fetched dream of Europe... anger is represented by the fact that one of the exam papers will be moved up to the STUDY WEEK. as if it isn't cruel enough to ONLY have ONE week of revisions. as Botak my classmate said, no more study week, just study days.... and don't give me that "you should be studying in an ongoing manner" crap - we were too busy drowning in heaps of assignments and homework to be totally and fully focused on revising.


although i'm not directly connected to the project, but i am too, incensed by the doings of a certain lecturer towards my friends. we (yes, WE) did the project presentation piece painstakingly, with passion and love and hope for approval and maybe some appreciation... and she shot them down just like that. without a chance to present. it feels like being rejected by parents, you know that? your title as a lecturer (or doctor, or professor, whatever) does not put you above the law or give you license to shoot your students down... 


i am also missing someone... the weekend was too short... conversations were had but weren't able to be finished... and i was kind of needy that time with my temper tantrums and petty jealousy - i'm truly sorry about that... i was just missing you and craving attention. huhuhuhu... but i'm trying to grow up a LOT more i promise :)


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