*sigh*

i have always harbored a need to be in the know about my partner's current affairs.

sometimes to the point of being paranoid.

but i wanted to change that. i don't want to be the crazy boyfriend anymore.

so i chose not to ask questions. after all, ignorance is bliss, they say.

but things and circumstances just keep pointing to the direction of CHEATING.

but i ignored everything, everything, everything.

i kept quiet. just pretend that everything's fine. but suspicious matters just kept on creeping in.

we all have heard of the rich housewives with cheating husbands, right?

i wonder how those housewives keep quiet about the knowledge about their husband's affair(s). maybe it's because they have lots of money to shut them up.

"as long as i'm well manicured, well-dressed, there's no reason to turn a molehill into a mountain, right?"

but i have none of the riches that they have - i have (or should i say HAD) only your love.

i trusted you. i loved you with all my heart. i gave love another chance because of you. but alas...

i'm a walking, talking joke. hurray for nazmi.

a friend told me to just leave it be when it ends - but i always, always, ALWAYS itch to know what is happening even after it's over.

in the end, i'm the one who's hurt from all the nasty revelations.

Paramore sang it well:

Well you treat me just like another stranger

Well it's nice to meet you

I guess I'll go

I best be on my way out